there was this awful post that became really popular on tumblr a while back that said something like “love is giving someone the power to destroy you but trusting them not to” or something along those lines…and it was honestly very very concerning…that really isn’t good enough
that’s not what relationships are about at all and please don’t let anyone tell you otherwise
relationships are about feeling safe, comfortable, and respected. you should feel at home with this person. you should feel like you’re best friends. you should be able to talk about whatever you want and to always feel secure and be able to communicate your feelings with this person
they’re not about giving or having “power” or about “destroying” anyone. they’re not based on negativity or fear. relationships should never be guided by power or fear, ever
1. he left on a wednesday, and no matter whether he came back or not, you still woke up on thursday, despite the rain.
2. the thoughts will stop. hopefully. just hang in there.
3. you are not a mistake by any caliber of being. no matter the situation or the universe or the circumstances. you are not a mistake.
4. friends can hurt you by trying to help you. do not be afraid to tell them. whether they understand or not, they will listen, and sometimes that will be all you need.
5. people you once valued can turn out not to be friends at all. do not mourn them. they are not worth it. do not hurt yourself over their loss. you deserve better.
6. watch movies with dead celebrities. sob over the loss of their talent. tear up at the meaning the films hold. it’s okay to let them move you. your feelings are not silly. you are not an irrational teenage girl. you feel things intensely. you hold empathy close. you are alright and okay how you are.
7. put the phone down after midnight. you’ll spend less nights crying over avoidable things.
8. cry as much as you need to. it’s okay to cry. don’t let anyone tell you differently.
9. don’t forget what makes you happy. you will, because it’s inevitable, but when you do, it’s just a drive down the road or a hug and a hand shake that can help you remember.
10. the things you do have ramifications and consequences. in moments of blind rage, fueled by hurt and betrayal, try so hard to remember that. save yourself the heartache later.
11. memories are not the enemy. take pictures. keep letters. don’t let yourself forget. trust me, forgetting will hurt more than however much looking at them does now.
12. step towards september still breathing and still alive. count the victories on both hands and all of your toes. remind yourself regularly that you are you, and you are enough.